Sometimes you learn a lot when you have conversations with little humans. I don’t remember what led to this topic, but my 9-year-old nephew and I were having a conversation on a lengthy ride home some time ago. He says to me something like a woman shouldn’t depend on or need a man. I immediately understood what he was trying to communicate; however, it led me to definitely clear up something with him. Although he made me proud that he understood a female, too, should and could go out and make life happen for herself, I wanted to make sure he understood one thing.

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6 KJV). We are to teach our children and instill in them certain truths and disciplines. But we also have to be careful of what beliefs we are spreading to our children verbally and non-verbally. I wanted to make sure my actions or lifestyle wasn’t screaming to him this very thing: that a man is not needed. I am an unmarried woman who is not dating, who is working hard, maintaining a household, growing in my faith in God, and working on furthering my dreams and goals. I have accomplished so much and have done things that were seemingly contributed to mostly married couples like buying a home.

So, I told him, “yes, we women are to not depend on men. In fact, we (both women and men) are supposed to depend solely on God. We, women are to fulfill our destinies and accomplish our goals” because God created each of us with a purpose also. “But, please understand that men are needed and wanted too.” A man is vital to our world. I know we hear and see lately “the future is female”. I also believe in empowering women and helping women grow, heal, and reach their destinies. Moreover, as a woman, I, too, see and experience the danger and issues we face daily. However, I want little boys, and especially little Black boys, to believe they matter and are needed. God created male and female and He has a destiny for us all individually as well as together. Together, we can fulfill and overcome so much more in a world that has grown so divided.