For some of us in Christ, our first encounters with Him may not be well-defined or easily told. That is the same with my story, but one thing I do know is that God came along and made me realize that He is a Father to the fatherless.
To reiterate: not everyone has a salvation story marked by a specific date or dramatic moment—and that’s okay. I was young when I first believed. I heard God’s word in church and felt God drawing me to Him. I read the Bible stories for children when I was a little girl, and when I got a bit older, the Bible for myself. I believed within my heart and subsequently confessed with my mouth that He was my redeemer, my Lord and Savior.
I grew up without my earthly dad and have never met him. As a little girl, I thought I was okay, but as I got older, I began to see the effects of not having one. Underneath it all, at times, I have come to realize I was not okay. Yet over the years, God has continued to show up, reminding me that He is a Father to the fatherless. Through every season, He has whispered this truth into my heart:
I was inspired to write this post after God gave me a word of encouragement for my loved one and subsequently a reminder for myself. We are living in such uncertain times, but God is faithful, and He wants us to trust Him more than ever. The despair can sometimes be overwhelming and leave us in a paralyzed state. But we must believe God to get up. There is also a video of encouragement now up on YouTube, so check that out as well, and please share for those who also need encouragement: https://youtu.be/ltPcmKs92uE?feature=shared
It is hard to come out of despair when depression and sadness weigh you down.
What about the years of disappointment and sickness?
Hopelessness and financial hardship?
Stress and fear that feel never-ending?
When life shifts painfully and unpredictably, we wonder:
Does God still care?
Because honestly, He seems silent… and absent in the pain.
You’ve been waiting on this long road for someone—anyone—to finally stop. To finally see you. To finally help you into your miracle. Your healing. Your breakthrough. Your new beginning. Your change.
You begin to wonder: Maybe God doesn’t care that I’m at my breaking point. Maybe this is punishment. Maybe He won’t come through this time…
You feel weary and stuck. Life has bruised you and kept you in a place where you’re both hurting and somehow comfortable in the ditch of despair.
Yes, trials and tribulations are part of life in a broken world. Sometimes, we suffer because of our own choices and sin. Other times, simply because life happens. And sometimes, we suffer for Christ’s sake. But no matter the reason, God uses every trial to build character, deepen our faith, and draw us closer to Him.
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33
“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.” – Romans 5:3–4
Still, it can be hard to rejoice and even feel grateful in the midst of suffering — especially when the weight of it all feels like it’s choking the very life and hope out of you.
Yet, we must remember that this too shall pass and that our trials are temporary. We must also allow ourselves to grieve and give ourselves grace during this time.
And when Jesus walks up beside you — yes, you — and asks, “Do you want to be healed?” Don’t respond with who didn’t help you. Don’t explain why you think healing is impossible.
Just say… Yes
Receive His healing. Receive His care. Receive His love.
Let hope beat loudly in your heart again.
“And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with His love.” – Romans 5:5
His love never fails. His promises are yes and Amen. His grace is enough. And His salvation carries a love stronger than any present trouble.
Jesus is on His way, and He sees you. He has counted every sleepless toss and turn. Every tear is recorded in His ledger. Every ache etched in His book (Psalm 56:8).
“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.” – Romans 8:28
“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’” – Jeremiah 29:11
This season may be dark. But there is light — because there is God. He sees you. He values you. He weeps with you. Even if your tears fall in the rain — He will not lose one.
Like the man at the Pool of Bethesda, you’ve been lying there waiting. You may be surrounded by others who are hurting, too. But Jesus sees you. He knows your exact condition. He wants to lift you up with His love and raise you out of despair.
“One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, He asked him, ‘Do you want to get well?’ ‘Sir,’ the invalid replied, ‘I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred…’” – John 5:5–7
But this is not about who helped you — or didn’t. This is about who is standing before you now.
Jesus.
Will you doubt Him because it’s been so long? Or will you say yes and receive?
Don’t worry about the others who got healed first. Jesus has more than enough for you.
You tried before. You struggled. But now, it won’t be by your strength.
And once you say yes…
“Then Jesus said to him, ‘Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.’ At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked…” – John 5:8–9
The man was healed instantly. But Jesus didn’t stop there. He told him to pick up the mat and walk.
Trust that when God speaks a word over your life, it will not return void. Trust that He wants you whole. Trust Him — and don’t forget your mat.
Because you won’t be in this place anymore.
And you don’t need to leave it behind for someone else to lie on.
That mat will become a testimony: proof that you’re not who you used to be. And proof God stopped beside you, saw you, and brought you out of a place you’ve been too long — all because He loves you.
May God heal you deeply — inside and out. May your healing overflow and become a blessing to others. May you rise from this place of despair with holy boldness and walk into the future He’s already prepared. May your faith pulse through your steps.
I saw people’s posts of their decade reviews and their end versus their beginning of the decade comparisons. This prompted me to review my decade and as I also looked at my 2019 vision board, I realized that God has been good. He is always good but sometimes the Holy Spirit need to give you a reminder. I saw some things on my vision board have been and are steadily being accomplished. And all glory goes to God!
I am also reminded some battles are not to be conquered in one fight but over a period of time so we can learn to depend on God. So some things may have seeped over into 2020 but be encouraged. I am speaking to myself too.
This decade, I became a homeowner and a parent/caregiver to a relative. I also started my online t-shirt business (on hiatus now and I am in prayer about it) and wrote and published three books within this decade. I was able to learn and grow professionally and spiritually. I healed from heartbreak and realized some of my deal breakers. I made it through betrayal and learned what true forgiveness looks like.
Instead of hiding it, I became more transparent in my struggles with anxiety and fear, especially with those I love. I also got my driver’s license in this decade and got acknowledged at work for my contributions. I saw my students grow and step out of their comfort zones. I bore fruit even during difficult seasons and impacted others in ways I could not have done without God. I also battled debt and high property taxes but saw God provide.
I learned I needed better self-care, I needed to set boundaries, and I needed to learn that I can’t earn God’s love. My family and I overcame some things I thought my family and I would not survive. I also learned that it is crucial to see things from God’s perspective. I journaled in my note pad like crazy. I did self-assessments prompted from bible plans and self-reflection. I blogged. I led a women’s group and bible study and we learned about waiting with God and learning to trust Him. I maintained a gratitude journal.
I travelled to New York with friends for the first time. I had a ball and it was such a faithcation. I went to a Christian concert at the House of Blues by myself and had a ball. I went to a Christian Education Retreat twice. I learned some awesome things. I learned about trauma care and self-love. I went to Atlanta for the first time and for a college tour, thanks to my job. Last year, my family and I found a cool, inexpensive place to travel to that is peaceful and a train ride away from home, thanks to not having at the time the money to go on vacation. I saw my family grow and get closer. I got such an awesome birthday gift in 2018; my youngest niece was born on my birthday.
I completed a Mental Health First Aid training for those who work with youth and realized also my mental health is important. I realized some of your battles people won’t understand and some blessings and successes people won’t cheer with you. The latter one broke my heart. I did the thing that rattles my nerves and spoke at a few events. I took deep breaths. I had anxiety attacks. I prayed. I cried. I prayed some more. I exercised here and there, valued my love for walking, and realized the importance of stretching every day. I worked on building my confidence. I started wearing a little concealer and foundation (something I thought I would never wear) and embraced my thick eyebrows. I learned how to do my own crochet hair styles. However, I still don’t know how to crochet a scarf. I gave up. I will try again this year. I learned that I enjoyed preparing Bible study lessons because I love God’s Word and preparing a lesson helps me to break it down for myself also. I learned that I can’t do everything or be everything, and that is okay. I learned that sometimes you have to encourage yourself.
I prayed for God to teach me full surrender. I talked with Him about being afraid and not feeling like I could make it some days. I have a ways to go but I am not where I started. And although I ended 2019 still feeling anxious, I survived. I thank God for being my Father, my friend, my provider, my coach, and my protector. I also thank Him for being patient with me and loving me through every season, imperfection, fear, and triumph. May I lean into God evermore in 2020 and this new decade not for what God can give me or do, but for who He is. I am nothing without Him and can’t do anything without Him. I am more than a conqueror. I am grateful.
I have always been hesitant in writing a post like this but I am writing it today to give encouragement to parents who are raising or helping to raise their relatives (cousins, nieces, nephews, or siblings). I have the privilege of helping raise my nephew and we have had our ups and downs but I am so grateful for this opportunity. He is my baby!!!! And I am committed to his care and well-being. However, often when I am unsure, unconfident, and need some advice sometimes I rarely find someone to turn to from a caregiver of a relative point of view and little advice on google. Nonetheless, the Holy Spirit reminds me of the One authority–God–on the subject that is full of knowledge about the very people He created. And His encouragement and wisdom are supreme, refreshing, and consistent.
Another thing I have noticed is that some people will not understand your unorthodox family. Some will be curious about your little one’s story but I had to learn that their story isn’t meant for everyone’s ears. I remember reading in a bible plan about foster parenting/caregiving that you have to protect the child’s story. And sometimes there are layers to his/her story and oddly enough, it may not be what people want to hear or even understand. It may be something complex or not as complex to explain. Whatever it is, it is still none of other people’s business. So, stop explaining to people. And all they need to know is that what is being done is for the child’s best interest.
So, when you feel discouraged or having a setback, God’s love and Word is life-giving and it propels you forward in the unknown and in every circumstance. His mercy and grace reminds you that you don’t have to be a perfect parent. His grace and mercy also give you the fuel to press in loving and instructing this beautiful child into receiving God’s love, seeking God, and discovering his/her destiny. Moreover, be present and enjoy this season or seasons where you get to watch your little ones blossom from the love of God. A man of God mentioned in the Bible understands raising a relative all so well. His name is Mordecai and he raised his cousin, Esther. He even prepared her for a destiny that involved helping save God’s people (Esther 2). So what can we learn from Mordecai?
✴Raise them with the authority and confidence of our Savior.
For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7
✴Raise them up in the Lord. Teach them God’s Word and love.
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
✴Trust them and their future in the hands of God.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
Lastly, be encouraged and don’t give up. You are on a God-given assignment.
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:1
Are you raising a relative? What encouragement would you give another caregiver?
Tannika Nikeya 