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Category Archives: Music
When Love, Raising A Family Together, And Relationship Mattered
It has been so disheartening to watch so many news reports and YouTube videos of so many women of all nationalities being murdered. It is especially scary and disheartening to see the majority of these beautiful ladies are Black women like myself. And even more unsettling is the back to back stories of pregnant Black women murdered and families left wondering why. According to Nature.com article, Homicide Is A Top Cause of Maternal Death In The United States, “researchers found that US women who are pregnant or were pregnant in the past 42 days (the post-partum period) die by homicide at more than twice the rate that they die of bleeding or placental disorders — the leading causes of what are usually classified as pregnancy-related deaths” (Subbaraman 12 November 2021).
We know that this world is experiencing much darkness in these times. We also know that the nucleus of society, family (relationship), is under attack, a severe one for its value, survival, and impact on communities.
So to see women, pregnant women, back to back murdered is shocking, but not so when you remember the enemy hates mankind and our chance for reconciliation with the Father through the blood and sacrifice of The Father’s Son, Jesus. To see us alive, operating in our purpose, and glorifying God are some things the devil scoffs at like the pre-intervention Scrooge at laughter on Christmas day.
When you see or hear another story of a pregnant woman slain, you may also wonder why. You may read comments on a YouTube video of blame, shame, and assumptions. But at the end of the day, we are living in a time where social media and technology have made news of such tragedies more swiftly widespread than ever. And we are living in a time where life isn’t valued as much, and lovers of self are increasing exponentially.
So why can’t there be divine order in many of our homes where men (good, integrous, godly, provider, protector ones) will be the heads of households? Why can’t women, and if I can be frank, why can’t Black women also, be protected? Why can’t men and women value family/marriage, and one that is healthy and thriving? Why can’t bringing a child into this world be one of joy instead of dread? Why can’t wedding day be something anticipated first and prepared for just as lavishly as baby showers? Why can’t both men and women communicate their intentions, goals, and expectations honestly and thoroughly before moving forward to sex, dating, etc.? Why can’t men hold themselves accountable also when it comes to procreating? Why don’t we teach our young adults before they hit that threshold to learn problem solving and understanding consequences and accountability? Why can’t we get back to promoting love over situationships, cheating, and lack of commitment and responsibility?
NONE of us are perfect and none of us have ever made great and right decisions ALL of the time or every time. But, let us be intentional with our relationships. Let us go out into this world having hearts and minds with the intention to bring peace and not division, destruction and harm. Let us heal and grow, and value ourselves and others. Let us learn to see ourselves the way God does to be able to do the above-mentioned. Let us get God back involved in a society that is sick and hurting, needing love and healing.
The song below prompted me to think about how love, raising a family together and relationship mattered. Feel free to listen.
Forever by Jodeci
Are You Experiencing Anxiety (10 Tips To Help You Cope)
Did you know that 40 million adults in the U.S. suffer from anxiety? And 25 percent of children suffer from an anxiety disorder (Anxiety and Depression Association of America).
Anxiety can be so limiting, frustrating, scary, and overwhelming. I have dealt with it for years, not initially recognizing what it was and how much it has affected my life. Yet, I serve a mighty God despite what anxiety may say. This may be a process and it may be day by day, step by step, but I will overcome. As I grow and heal as well as learn to trust God, I am also learning to cope with anxiety.
And this year has brought on more stress. So, I am sure more people are feeling anxious. People who have suffered from anxiety prior to the pandemic, you may be even more anxious. So, how do we cope with anxiety?
10 Ways To Cope With Anxiety (These are not in a specific order)
1. When you are anxious, don’t fight what you are physically feeling, don’t try to pause the pain, or suppress your emotions. Often times when I was anxious or having an anxiety attack, I would try and fight it with the intent to hurry and make it go away. But it would only make me feel worse. You are trying to fight your anxiety attack from rising when your body is already in fight or flight mode. Sounds crazy don’t it but I would do just that. After finding such tip on another google search and practicing it, I found not fighting it helped me to calm down much more effectively and quicker than it would have fighting it. Sometimes, we try to avoid what we feel. Feel it. Then take a deep breath and release it.
2. Rest. Don’t just take naps. But for people who are constantly busy and rarely take naps, every now and then we need to incorporate nap time. Get some sleep. I realized my lack of sleep or lack of quality of sleep also triggers my anxiety. Even lack of healthy eating and lack of eating adequate meals can trigger anxiety. Ok so back to rest. Pause to pray and play. Enjoy the moment. Embrace the present. Catch up on self-care, family time, organizing and even doing some things God has laid on your heart to do that you have wanted to do for awhile. Rest means pausing to be productive and present.
3. Practice deep breathing. I am still learning how to properly do this but it helps to tell your body to calm down by releasing adequate oxygen in your body through your blood and a calm order to your brain. And it is helping. It lets me tell my body “ok, I feel you.” “Im paying attention. We are going to be okay.”
4. Watch something funny and laugh daily. Mass consumption of reading and watching videos of what’s going on right now can be unhealthy. I was reading something recently about a new rare symptom or so in kids getting Covid and I could feel my eyesight get blurry and head start to hurt. It was overwhelming. Fear is increasing in the land. God did not give us a spirit of fear but that of power, love and a sound mind. So, remember that and laugh away. Laughter has been a good distraction and great medicine.
5. Pray and read the Word of God. His Word is alive and active. God’s promises and Word still stand. He is God Almighty and the prayers of the righteous availeth much. Keep praying. Keep reading His Word. I will read His Word and God will pinpoint something to pray regarding a situation. Let us involve God in every area of our lives. He cannot fail. He will not fail.
6. Take one day at a time. Don’t worry about tomorrow. You are not there yet. Focus on today. Don’t rush the process. And trust God one day at a time. Be patient. Be patient with yourself. Be patient with others. Be patient with God after all He is patient with us.
7. Practice self-care and add it to your calendar if you have to. You’d be surprise how some people with anxiety are consumed with worry and meeting the needs of others that they tend to neglect their own care. And sometimes it isn’t the physical care they neglect, but the mental and emotional care.
8. Get therapy and seek God. It is okay to get therapy. Talking with someone who is neutral, is not directly involved in your pain and personal business, and is trained in guiding you towards self-awareness, identifying the trauma and guiding you to solutions as well as identifying choices you have to heal and move forward is a great resource and support. Moreover, seek God, for His wisdom is not of this world. He created you and first loved you so He has, and knows, and wants what is best for you. He has the solutions you need. And He wants you to be free from the spirit of fear.
9. Do your healing homework. What triggers your anxiety? Why are you worried? Upon prayer and the Holy Spirit’s counsel, I found that a particular workplace was one of my anxiety triggers. I was then able to pray concerning such and delve deeper as to why I would feel anxious there and begin the work to have a better experience in that environment. Things changed and you know what, the change started in me first. I had to learn to see the people in this environment the way God did. I had to, well am still learning to, learn to see myself the way God sees me also.
10. Learn effective coping techniques. What are some things you can do to manage your stress and anxiety? What are some things you like to do to relax or have fun? Are they healthy and effective? Like listening to some good old music. I know someone told me they have been listening to Stevie Wonder. I listen to 90’s music and sometimes just worship music. Sometimes, I watch funny things like a comedy sketch. Laughter is good medicine as I mentioned before. I love taking walks. I journal sometimes. I also take time to acknowledge how I feel. Being transparent with myself and others helps me as well as others. Moreover, I am learning to be more transparent with God. Not that He doesn’t know, but sharing the matters of your heart with God is refreshing and empowering. Reading books. Cooking. Sharing a meal with family and friends. Helping someone else helps take your mind off of you for a short while and blessing someone else blesses you. I also have recently started praying in tongues more in the morning. I wake up a lot of mornings with anxiety so praying in tongues and worshiping God has been a great help. It takes my mind off of me and puts it back on God.
What are other ways one can cope with anxiety?
Disclaimer: I am not a therapist or expert on anxiety. These are merely tips from research and from my own experience and are not intended to cure, treat, or diagnose medical conditions.
God Is More Than Enough
This morning I was led to reflect on and search the scriptures about the following:
God is more than enough.
Thoughts of insignificancy ravages many of our minds. They repeat over and over again that “I’m not good enough”, “I don’t have much”, “they have more or it all”, “I won’t make it”, “if only I had more of”, “I am nothing without him/her/this career/this title”. We are constantly being delivered messages from the enemy, our pasts, our fears and failures, those around us and from what we see on television or on social media. Our past and present can bombard us with reminders of what we need or think we need, what we lost or what we are losing. Moreover, those messages we get from television or social media try to convince us, and often times succeed, that we are only somebody when we have this or that. However, those things will never be enough because those gratifications may satisfy us and give us a temporary fulfillment but not a lasting, deep fulfillment. I have learned that true fulfillment can only come through the One who created us and first loved us–God.
When I started pondering about “God is more than enough” and searching the scriptures, the chorus or hook of a song popped into my head. It is a Hip Hop song, titled You’re All I Need, whose hook was based from a greater oldie titled You’re All I Need To Get By by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell. The Hip Hop song is rapped and sung by Method Man and Mary J. Blige. This is one of my Hip Hop faves.
“You’re alll I needddd…to get byyyy iii iii.”
I began singing this to God noting that God is more than enough. He is the Source to my resources. He is my Father, my Maker, my First Love, my Present Help in the time of trouble. My Shield, my Protector, my Provider, the One who breathes life into me every day. The One who gave His only begotten Son so I could have true and eternal life and reconciliation back with Him. He is the only One that brings stability and certainty to my life in a world that is broken and uncertain. He is the One that apart from Him I can do nothing. He is the One who loves me unfailingly and beyond measure. He is the One who gives me mercies daily, forgives me, and nurtures me through life and a world that can break me and discard me.
I researched scriptures to see where in God’s Word it confirmed God is more than enough and these are some scriptures that stood out:
- Genesis 33:11 reminds me that because of God’s graciousness I have more than enough. How has God been gracious to you? Find the glory of God displayed in also the small things. What spiritual gifts, talents, opportunities, blessings has God given you that give God glory and exude God’s nature as well as His love for you and others?
- John 3:16 reminds me that God sacrificed so greatly for me because He thought I (and you) was more than enough. We were of such great worth to Him that He would give someone of such great worth to Himself, His only Son, to die for you and me. For that God is more than enough. His love is unmeasurable, unmatchable, and unfailing. How has God’s love and sacrifice made a difference in your life? Why may God’s love be more than enough in your life? What would life be like without the blood of Jesus?
- The entire Psalms 23 reminds me that God is more than enough. This psalm helps identify how much of a blessing and necessity God’s existence and presence is to me and my life. He’s all I need to get by. He’s all I need to survive. God is not just my provider but resting place. My shield, my present help in the time of trouble, the source to my resources. What needs of yours has God met this week? Why is believing and embracing God as more than enough than seeking fulfillment in things and others? How does Psalm 23 reassure you that God is with you and more than enough?
- I found other scriptures that reminds me that God is more than enough but I don’t want to be too lengthy. What scriptures can you find that remind you that God is more than enough?
I leave you with these other words from the interlude verse of Mary J. Blige. Sing these words today to the Lord. He is more than enough. He deserves your quality time, worship, and full surrender.
Like sweet morning dew
I took one look at you
And it was plain to see
You were my destiny
With you I’ll spend my time
I’ll dedicate my life, I’ll sacrifice for you
Dedicate my life to you
Happy Saturday loves,
Put your shoes on honey, our journeys await!
My 90’s Faves
🎵🎧🎵I love music and one of my favorite music eras is the 90s, New Jack Swing, real sangin’, the group’s era. So, since it is my birthday tomorrow–well in 33 mins–let me share some of my favorite songs.
1. Never Lie by Immature
2. I Wanna Be Down by Brandy
3. I Like the Way (The Kissing Game) by HiFive
4. Jump by Kris Kross
5. Real Love By Mary J. Blige
6. Gotta Be by Jagged Edge
7. Tribute to a Woman by Ginuwine
8. One In A Million by Aaliyah
9. Always Be My Baby by Mariah Carey
10. If I Ever Fall in Love By Shai
11. Don’t Take It Personal by Monica
12. We Can’t Be Friends by Deborah Cox and RL
13. Beauty by Dru Hill
14. Make It Hot by Nicole Wray
15. Unbreak My Heart by Toni Braxton
16. Be Encouraged by William Becton
17. No Weapon by Fred Hammond
18. Keep Ya Head Up by Tupac
19. I Like Your Smile by Shanice
20. Scream by Michael Jackson and Janet Jackson
21. Soon As I Get Home by Faith Evans
22. What About Your Friends by TLC
23. His Eye is on The Sparrow by Lauryn Hill and Tanya Blount
24. Addicted Love By BeBe & CeCeWinans
25. Juicy by Notorious B.I.G
26. My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion
27. Go Up Yonder by Walter Hawkins and Love Counter
28. Let’s Chill by Guy
29. Tell Me What You Want Me To Do by Tevin Campbell
30. Forever My Lady by Jodeci. JVideo
31. Can You Stand The Rain by New Edition. NEVideo
32. You’re Always On My Mind by SWV. SWVVideo
33. Silver & Gold by Kirk Franklin and The Family. KFVideo
34. Keep On Walking by CeCe Peniston. CPVideo
35. Doo Wop by Lauryn Hill. LHVideo
36. Brenda’s Got A Baby by Tupac. TVideo
37. I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston. WHVideo