Category Archives: Healing

08.10.20
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Facing Truth

Recently, a couple of my family members and I were having a discussion (and argument) about hurt that we have and are experiencing with one another. Letting someone know that their actions and attitudes are causing pain can be difficult as well as hearing that your actions and attitudes are hurting someone can be uncomfortable. Hearing how someone feels or hearing truth can be unsettling, discouraging, and maybe even embarrassing if we are honest. It can even make you mad and respond back with more hurt. That is why healing is so imperative. When we face truth, God wants us to be able to respond from a place of love and eagerness for allowing God into every area of our lives, including the painful ones. Sometimes we put up barriers and shut down. Oh, I know that all too well. I would also shut down even when someone offended me or if I disappointed them in some way. Conflict was difficult for me. But thank God for His constant teachings, His grace, and therapy even with Him. I still have a ways to go but He has brought me a long way.

This morning, as I read one of my Bible plans and it discussed repentance, I began to also repent for the times I wasn’t totally honest with people in fear of how they would respond. I subsequently thought about the woman at the well and how she could have responded to Jesus during their dialogue. Jesus was frank with her although He preceded in love. He drew her in by validating her existence and showing her respect despite her reputation and Jews not dealing with Samaritans like that. And he continued with addressing something she had to face. She had been married several times and her latest boo wasn’t even her husband.

Jesus knew the Pharisees had heard that he was baptizing and making more disciples than John (though Jesus himself didn’t baptize them—his disciples did). So he left Judea and returned to Galilee. He had to go through Samaria on the way. Eventually he came to the Samaritan village of Sychar, near the field that Jacob gave to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there; and Jesus, tired from the long walk, sat wearily beside the well about noontime. Soon a Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, “Please give me a drink.” He was alone at the time because his disciples had gone into the village to buy some food. The woman was surprised, for Jews refuse to have anything to do with Samaritans. She said to Jesus, “You are a Jew, and I am a Samaritan woman. Why are you asking me for a drink?” Jesus replied, “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.” “But sir, you don’t have a rope or a bucket,” she said, “and this well is very deep. Where would you get this living water? And besides, do you think you’re greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well? How can you offer better water than he and his sons and his animals enjoyed?” Jesus replied, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.” “Please, sir,” the woman said, “give me this water! Then I’ll never be thirsty again, and I won’t have to come here to get water.” “Go and get your husband,” Jesus told her. “I don’t have a husband,” the woman replied. Jesus said, “You’re right! You don’t have a husband— for you have had five husbands, and you aren’t even married to the man you’re living with now. You certainly spoke the truth!” “Sir,” the woman said, “you must be a prophet. So tell me, why is it that you Jews insist that Jerusalem is the only place of worship, while we Samaritans claim it is here at Mount Gerizim, where our ancestors worshiped?” Jesus replied, “Believe me, dear woman, the time is coming when it will no longer matter whether you worship the Father on this mountain or in Jerusalem. You Samaritans know very little about the one you worship, while we Jews know all about him, for salvation comes through the Jews. But the time is coming—indeed it’s here now—when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The Father is looking for those who will worship him that way. For God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.” The woman said, “I know the Messiah is coming—the one who is called Christ. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.” Then Jesus told her, “ I Am the Messiah!” Just then his disciples came back. They were shocked to find him talking to a woman, but none of them had the nerve to ask, “What do you want with her?” or “Why are you talking to her?” The woman left her water jar beside the well and ran back to the village, telling everyone, “Come and see a man who told me everything I ever did! Could he possibly be the Messiah?” So the people came streaming from the village to see him. Meanwhile, the disciples were urging Jesus, “Rabbi, eat something.” But Jesus replied, “I have a kind of food you know nothing about.” “Did someone bring him food while we were gone?” the disciples asked each other. Then Jesus explained: “My nourishment comes from doing the will of God, who sent me, and from finishing his work. You know the saying, ‘Four months between planting and harvest.’ But I say, wake up and look around. The fields are already ripe for harvest. The harvesters are paid good wages, and the fruit they harvest is people brought to eternal life. What joy awaits both the planter and the harvester alike! You know the saying, ‘One plants and another harvests.’ And it’s true. I sent you to harvest where you didn’t plant; others had already done the work, and now you will get to gather the harvest.” Many Samaritans from the village believed in Jesus because the woman had said, “He told me everything I ever did!” When they came out to see him, they begged him to stay in their village. So he stayed for two days, long enough for many more to hear his message and believe. Then they said to the woman, “Now we believe, not just because of what you told us, but because we have heard him ourselves. Now we know that he is indeed the Savior of the world.”
John 4:1‭-‬42 NLT
https://bible.com/bible/116/jhn.4.1-42.NLT

Notice though that she already knew the state she was in. Hence she traveled to the well at such an uncomfortable time so she can avoid others who looked down on her (dummies.com/religion/christianity/the-bible/spiritual-rebirth-the-samaritan-woman-at-the-well/). And she clearly states that she is not married. She also knows the “messiah (Christ Jesus) is coming and will proclaim all things to us.” However, what intrigued me when I read this story was how Jesus was so frank with her and how she did not run away from Him in despair or offense. She received the truth about the sin in her life and her thirst for a savior. She was so excited about such revelation, Him knowing what was going on with her. She was also excited about the fact that He can meet the need of eternal salvation and fulfillment, whether she fully understood it or not. She ran boldly in to the village and told others about Jesus. This resulted in many of the people believing that Jesus is the Savior.

Much of healing is discovering truth, truth about what’s going on inside of you and your heart. As God exposes some things for you to face, repent from, and heal from, don’t run from God in despair or offense. God wants you to heal. God wants to have a relationship with you. God wants you to know He loves you and He is here to fulfill you. And God will give you the grace and strength to endure this part of the healing process. Don’t avoid the pain, the emotions, the truth, the forgiveness, the repentance, and the Savior when He comes waiting for you at the well. Let us face the Truth–Jesus.

Father,

Help us to allow You to bring those things to the surface in our lives that You want us to face and we have been so afraid to deal with. It is uncomfortable and disheartening at times but give us grace to hear the truth and face it. More importantly, let us receive the Truth, the Life and the Way which is Your Son, Jesus. And help us to see ourselves and others the way You do. Your grace is sufficient and the joy of the Lord is our strength. Renew our minds and let us begin to heal. But first we must seek ye first Your kingdom and righteousness and we will have all we need including the things we need to heal and grow. Comfort us too and envelop us with Your unfailing love. Help us to give You all of our failures, fear, disappointments, traumas, and heartbreaks. You love us beyond measure and You care for us with Your omnipotence and mercy. In Jesus’s name, amen.

08.06.20
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Use This Time Wisely

Many of us are enduring reopening phases as well as quarantine during this pandemic. It hasn’t been easy but for the most part, we have made adjustments to how we do things from our careers to home life. Nonetheless, this pandemic has served much stress, loss, anxiety, uncertainty and hardships. Yet, many are still holding on despite the turmoil from Covid-19 and even the many issues, like racism and gun violence, that are now on the forefront of our current society that people are waiting and fighting for to finally be addressed.

As in one hand chaos and turmoil increase in the world and in another hand the world slows down. We are left to understand that we can’t approach life as we have been. We may have to make some adjustments that are deep within and that will prepare us for the next season. We may have to reevaluate how we were living before this time. Rediscover some goals and dreams. Realize that God can use this time for our good and He can help us use this time wisely.

Were you burned out prior to the quarantine? Were you in need of some quality time with your family? Did you have a business or foundation that has been on your heart to start? How about following through with writing or face timing a person God has laid on your heart to reach out to remind them God cares? Did you want to finally get healthy mentally and physically? Did you need to learn a second language? Did you need to let go of some things and some relationships? Did you need to get your bank account healthy? Did you need to finally deal with some pain and trauma? Did you need to strengthen your prayer life and faith walk? How about learning patience and trusting God?

Prior to the quarantine, shutdown, Pandemic, I was burned out. Overwhelmed and anxiety through the roof. I had some things I needed to deal with, boundaries to set, and goals to accomplish. One of those goals was to build my trust in God. And I also desired to have more quality time with God in prayer, His Word and presence. Other goals were simply to cook more, be more present with my family, write more, work on and eventually release my book. I also wanted to practice more self-care. I needed more self-care.

Using my time wisely and accomplishing these goals haven’t been easy and I am far from perfectly disciplined, if there is such a thing. However, by the grace of God, I have come to grow in these areas and accomplish some of my goals. I give glory to God because He not only knows what I need and what those around me need, but He works all things together for my good.

I have been cooking more, making sweets and dishes such as cheesecakes, brownies, shrimp and chicken alfredo and more.

I love food and I love cooking and sharing my cooking moments and meals with family have been great.

I finished my book; praise God, and I am enjoying again taking photos of nature. I have also been tackling fear and anxiety by being vulnerable with God, with prayer, His Word and grace.

Additionally, I’m learning to rest, spiritually, in the Lord and naturally to replenish and refuel. Walking with family, movie nights, and having pool time or errand runs have helped me to be present with family. I also sought a bit of therapy and started back journaling. God told me a while ago to reprioritize and organize my life. I wish I had started this mission before all of this but it is not too late.

God first and foremost and then everyone and everything else shall fall in their proper place. Learning to trust God and set boundaries will also help me to get some order in my life. Letting the Holy Spirit lead me and doing things with purpose and simplicity in mind will also help. Lastly, I aim to continue with strengthening my faith walk and love walk.

To conclude, I don’t know your goals or what God is calling you to do. I don’t know what you need to heal from, what things you need to part ways from and who you need to turn you attention back to. But I do know that you still have time today right now to choose to use your time wisely and set the stage for God to lead the way in your life. To choose to go deeper in the things of God and dwell in His presence like never before.

To choose to receive the life and life to the full Jesus came to give us as well as receive God’s unfailing love. To choose to live simply, fruitfully and purposefully. Prepare now and pray more. Rest while you can. Ask God to teach you to trust Him and rebuild your life on the foundation of His Son. Seasons will change. Prepare for the next season. Learn from this one and do all that you are supposed to do in this one.

Put Your Shoes On Honey,

Our journey awaits,

Tannika

07.21.20
by

Let It Surface

I am so excited about completing my new book. I didn’t know it would lead to the theme it has now, but God has me on a healing journey and the title change was so imperative. This healing journey has been one that has been lengthy, uncomfortable, challenging, yet imperative, enlightening, and such a blessing. I have discovered, thanks to the Holy Spirit and His grace to not abandon the process as well as so many things about myself. I have learned some triggers to my anxiety and where certain fears began. I am also learning to trust God and receive His unfailing love. I am learning to see myself the way God does. Moreover, prayer, learning to be transparent with God as well with others, facing my fears (one at a time), the Word of God, therapy, learning to be more present with myself, others and God are some things that have been crucial to this journey. (Note: I am still a work in progress.) Writing is another component of this journey and it has served as an outlet to express myself, learn, and cope. I have realized that my writing also serves as a tool to encourage others. My book, Bring It To The Surface, is not only full of poetic inspiration and encouragement but a journal to help you too to start your journey of healing and provide a space for self-reflection.

If you are feeling empty or lost, hurt or hopeless, stripped or depleted, know God who began a good work in you shall continue to perform it until the day of Christ Jesus. Know that He will also never leave you, nor forsake you. Whatever it is the enemy has killed, stolen, and destroyed in your life, God can revive, recover, and restore. And in order to heal and receive the abundant life Jesus came to give us, we have to allow God to bring some things to the surface. We can trust God who first loved us and gave His only begotten Son in order for you and me to have an eternal love and life. So, let the healing begin. Confess it, express it and then address it. God can handle your pain and God can provide the answers you need. I am so excited for this book to reach your hands and heart, and I pray you allow God to bring some things to the surface.

Available on Amazon now!!!!!!

07.18.20
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Introducing My New Book!

Hey Loves,

I am so excited to introduce to you my new book!!!! I have finally finished it and it is now available in the Kindle Store. The paperback version has been updated and is now available on Amazon. So, please get your copy or your ebook version now. This is my fourth poetry book and this one is different from my others. Watch the video and found out how!

Bring It To The Surface

06.20.20
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Watch “Bring It To The Surface” on YouTube

Hey loves, please watch, share, and like my new video/recording of my new poem Bring It To The Surface.

Tannika❤

Click on the link below⬇

Bring It To The Surface

06.06.20
by

2020

I wrote this poem a couple or few months ago but made a few edits recently. This year has been said to be a horrible year, and we are just five months and six days down. This year started off rough for me and has continued on to be a challenge. In fact these past four years or so have been challenging (I use the word challenging because they were still blessings and I have learned so much). However, I remember when this year had just started a lot of people exclaimed that this would be the year of 2020 vision, clarity, the best year, and so forth. One thing for sure it has definitely been a year of clarity. It is like the curtain is being pushed back. But for me personally, this is another year of learning to trust God, another year of healing, and a year where God is drawing me closer to reprioritize and organize so that He can be first and everything else can fall in its right place. And this is the year for me to understand how to overcome and overcome those things that were draining me as well as distracting me, trying to keep me out of my destiny, and from healing and growing. So, this year is an uncomfortable one for me, and I bet it is uncomfortable for many others but this discomfort is needed. Let God open up our eyes and let God sit us down to have those personal and generational talks with each of us. Be willing and lean on Him for grace to receive His truth and His heart.


2020

I see you trying to be still

Trying to keep joy in the midst of chaos and sinking hill

This world is sick

And all signs point to last days

Some of us are so numb that with every new event we are unfazed

The spirit of deception is

Filling the airwaves and skies

Increasing also corruption and lies

People are dying and life ain’t the same

Coronavirus is spreading and taking lives

And it doesn’t care about your money, fame, or name

The foundation of our land

Is crumbling fast

From the seeds sown today as well as the past

Division and Racism

Pride and ego

Corroding the core of our foundation

Nation against nation

Money and fame are our gods

Fear and emotional disarray

Increasing every day

Everybody wants their own way

Envy and lust for power

The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy

he shows up to work every day ready to devour

The fatherless and the widow, not to mention those whose hope is shrinking

And everyone in between

Authenticity of Identity and Empathy has left the scene

Some of our love for others and ourselves are sour

And some of us trying to find our voice and not cower

There is little respect and more destruction of the Black flower

Fighting to survive every hour

Police corruption and racial bias

My skin is a threat

No empathy or sympathy for me

They would say I deserved my death

Senseless violence

And pent up pain in our hearts

Many of our youth are lost

We must save our children

And receive the abundant life

But some of us are afraid to take up our cross and count the cost

Dreams and destinies fill the grave

Anxiety and depression are soaring

We have a lot of Elijahs hiding in the cave

Fear of persecution

Fear of being alone

We are living in times where wrong is right and right is wrong

We are drowning in despair

Reaching for someone to stop and truly care

We are starving for integrity,

Humility, and real love

And needing answers that only God can supply from above

By Tannika Moore

05.16.20
by

Poetry, Some Wine, And A Lot Of Self-Love

Hey Loves,

I am so excited about this next Q&A with new author, Deandrea Moore. She has always been a great writer and now she is an author. Her new book, I’ll Take Wine With That is available on Amazon right now and a must have. Go grab you a glass of wine or water, and come enjoy this Q&A with me and Deandrea.

Tannika: Hello Deandrea, how are you?

Deandrea: Hello, I’m doing fine, considering everything that’s going on in the world. Although things are crazy right now, I feel that I needed this time. I’ve definitely used it to my advantage.

Tannika: You just recently wrote and published your first book, I’ll Take Wine With That. Can you tell me about the process? What did you learn? What was challenging? And what were the fun parts?

Deandrea: Yes, I just recently published my first book and it was a process that started in September last year. I learned a lot about myself and gained confidence in my writing again, which was probably one of the most challenging parts. Coming up with the idea for the book, the table of contents and the poems themselves were the fun parts. Coming up with the table of contents felt like coming up with a track list for a CD, but I wanted to do that first to catch the vibe of the book I was going for. Although coming up with the poems was fun, it was also challenging. In some of the poems, I had to really allow myself to be vulnerable in my writing, which is a bit difficult for me. I also learned that there are so many different styles to writing and poetry.

Tannika: I find elements of vulnerability, femininity, transparency, courage and self-reflection. But I want to know what is the theme of your poetry book?

Deandrea: The theme of my book would definitely be self-reflection, but broken into different sections. I have a couple poems about love, intimacy, the other side of love, and seasons in life, and making progress.

Tannika: What is the other side of love?

Deandrea: The other side of love is just the parts we don’t want to have to deal with or what happens after love is over. That’s why the different poems in that section are about jealousy, wanting to go back (tempting), and heartbreak.

Tannika: Why did you name your book, I Will Take Wine With That?

Deandrea: I named my book I’ll Take Wine With That because I use to drink wine as a coping method when I was going through things. I started going to counseling and I now use it in a responsible way. I also had a glass during writing several of these poems. I love wine as well.

Tannika: What is your favorite wine? I love the cranberry wine from Cooper’s Hawk.

Deandrea: My favorite wine, if I’m going for something cheap and good, would be Oak Leaf’s White Zinfandel. If I’m going for something really sweet, then it would be Stella Rosa Peach or Carlos Rossi’s Sweet Red.

Tannika: You talked about being depressed and coping? Why is it important to have these discussions about mental health in the Black community?

Deandrea: Yes, I was depressed and using wine to cope. We need to start having these mental health conversations in the black community because we’re not immune to mental health issues. We think that we can handle things on our own or they’ll just go away, but they must be dealt with. When we don’t deal with things we pass them down or we lose lives. Also, when we make sure our minds are healthy, then we can progress.

Tannika: You have beautiful poems and are a great writer! How has writing also helped you?

Deandrea: Writing has helped me to release some feelings I had inside. It has also helped me to gain confidence, not just in writing but in myself. Lastly, writing has helped me to be a little more open and vulnerable with others, but still protective of myself.

Tannika: One of your poems is titled Self-Love Story? What advice would you give young ladies to develop self-love and genuine confidence?

Deandrea: Yes, Self-Love Story is one of my favorite poems because this year is dedicated to that and getting back my self confidence. Advice I would give to young ladies would be to always make sure your cup is the first one you pour into, because if your cup is empty then you’ll find yourself drained trying to pour into others. I would also say to be selfless, but selfish with your time, energy, etc. Also, take time to find yourself and do the things that make you happy. Take time to practice self-care and not just face masks and pedicures, but mental self-care, making sure you’re working to become the best version of yourself. Don’t compromise your happiness for anyone or any relationship.

Tannika: Ok fun question. What is one fun fact your readers may not know about you and one fun thing you have been doing to cope with the quarantine and provide yourself with self-care?

Deandrea: Something my readers may not know about me is that I want to practice makeup on the side. Something fun I’ve been doing during quarantine to cope is learning how to do more hairstyles on myself, give myself pedicures and practice makeup.

For more information on writer and author, Deandrea Moore, and to order I’ll Take Wine With That, visit https://winenwords.com/.

 
 
 
05.02.20
by

What I Brought To The Table

I came and sat down at the table
Carrying what I had made in my hands
So excited and pleased
I wanted to show Jesus what I had made
But it fell apart as I set it on the table
It was destroyed and I was crushed
I looked at Jesus, who was sitting across from me, with my eyes wide and full of disappointment
Tears began to slide heavily down my cheeks
Jesus got up, came and sat closer to me
And put His hand on mine
He looked me in the eyes and said don’t worry,
We will rebuild it together
I know what it takes to build it right
And to make it last
He sat there with me
Patiently
And with a smile
We talked and laughed
He comforted me and
He let me pour out my heart to Him
And I felt safe
He worked with me
And guided me through
The careful rebuilding of what I brought to the table
It looked different
It looked new
He breathed on it
And it came to life
He spoke to it
And strengthened it with His might
It was my life
And as I surrendered mine and received His
I knew then I was going to be alright.

Tannika Nikeya

10.20.19
by

Seized By The Storm

For You have been a strength to the poor, A strength to the needy in his distress, A refuge from the storm, A shade from the heat; For the blast of the terrible ones is as a storm against the wall. Isaiah 25:4 NKJV

I recently finished watching Raising Dion, a science fiction/super hero series, in which a mom, who is grieving the loss of her husband, discovers her child has supernatural abilities and seeks to not only protect him but find out the mysteries surrounding her new normal. I was also elated to see a little black boy hero, Dion (Ja’Siah Young), one my nephews can see themselves in. Nonetheless, this series was so good and made me get emotional at times. Nicole’s character, (Alisha Wainwright) the mom, was such a force and relatable in her struggles. The dad, Mark (Michael B. Jordan), was such a force too as well as handsome. Oh and I love Esperanza (Sammi Haney), Dion’s friend, who is bound to a wheelchair but so full of life and character. I think it is awesome to see that representation also for kids who have disabilities. Everyone did an amazing job in this series. But one thing that jumped out to me that had me once again turning a scene or part of a film into a spiritual lesson to my nephew was about Pat (Jason Ritter). Warning: Spoiler Alert.

In Raising Dion, the integrity of Pat’s soul is compromised and corrupted, and I believe way before the storm enters his and Mark’s life. Observing closely, you realize that Pat has some insecurities and issues that fully surface towards the end of the series. And that is how I believe the storm was able to attach itself to him and over time weaken him. He became the Crooked Man.

I understand that everyone has been affected by evil in some way for we live in a broken world corrupted by sin and the enemy’s deception as well as all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. I also believe we may ignorantly welcome it perhaps through sin and not guarding our hearts. Moreover, what happens when we get use to it and it feeds off of our pain and insecurities, the issues of our hearts? It fully corrupts us and weakens us. And it can cut us off from dwelling in the presence of God. It can cost us relationships and things that God has for us or has blessed us with. It can rob us of our potential and it can affect others around us. It can destroy us and rob us of our destinies.

But no one wants to be seized by the storm. So, if you are not on the winning team and don’t have the He in you that is greater than the he that is in the world, I encourage you to seek out the only Savior that can overcome not just the storm in your life, but has overcome this world and every evil spirit. Read Romans 10.

And let every believer of Jesus Christ saturate in the Word of God. Let us develop the fear of the Lord and start praying for a life in God’s presence. Let us also allow God to heal us and process us through His unfailing love and Word. Let us bind up, with the Word of God, authority of Jesus Christ, and the power of the Holy Spirit, every demonic force in our lives and our children’s lives. The storm wants to rob our children of their destinies, potential, and gifts from God. Don’t give in to the storm or enemy because of convenience and because sometimes it is too tiresome to fight. And don’t be passive or even passive until the stuff hit the fan.

Learn to wage war now. And let us seek the Holy Spirit to teach and guide us and our children how to use our kingdom’s benefits and godly power. Let the Holy Spirit also accompany our children like Charlotte (Deirdre Lovejoy) who not only taught Dion how to use his powers but went invisibly yet greatly present with Dion to school. Sorry for any spoilers if you haven’t watched the series. It is on Netflix now.

So, what can we do to wage war against the storm seizing our lives and destinies? What must we do when evil spirits get comfortable in our lives and weaken us spiritually?

  • Receive salvation, an eternal, free gift from God. Read Romans 10.
  • Cover yourself and your family members with the blood of Jesus.
  • Pray daily.
  • Read and pray the Word of God.
  • See your opponent and sin through the eyes of God and fight accordingly as God leads and with the armor of God as a believer.
  • Pray for God to till the grounds of our souls, to break up the fallow ground in our hearts. Create in us a clean heart and renew a right spirit within us, God, and heal us wholly.

Prayer:

Father, thank You for Your saving grace and unfailing love. Deliver us from evil. Help us hear Your Word for faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God. Don’t let us prostitute our gifts or use them in a corrupted manner or at Your disapproval. Send people in our lives to teach us how to steward over these gifts properly and to give You honor. Help us to guard our children with the blood of Jesus and prayer. Help us to train them in Christ Jesus who is the Way and the Truth and Life. Suit us up in the armor of God and Father, forgive us of all our sins and for opening those doors we have opened willingly and unknowingly to the enemy. Let us value the things of the kingdom of God and godly relationships. Let us put You first and nurture our relationships with You. Holy Spirit, You are welcomed into our lives, homes, jobs, and families. Have Your way! Heal us and help us to trust You as You grow us up in the Lord. We bind up generational curses and strongholds in the name of Jesus. We bind up everything that is detrimental to our faith, relationships, health, destinies, and spiritual development. In Jesus’ name amen.

If you watched this series, what are some other spiritual lessons you were inspired to learn or take note of?

08.29.19
by

Do You Have A Chip On Your Shoulder

Not often do I hear men say, “ladies first” when it is time to board the bus. So, on one particular morning this week, I was elated to see one guy lead by example and let the ladies on first. But after a couple or few of us proceeded onto the bus, commotion broke out behind me as I walked to my seat. When I turned around, there was an older gentleman who was already on the bus with the bus driver when we boarded trying to stop an altercation from escalating. Even moreso, he stood in front of a young lady, who I believe was a teen, and was trying to block and stop a man from hitting her. The man was the same one who had just let the ladies go first. Why they were fighting, I do not know exactly. He said that she hit him first and she said something about he said ladies first and something about tapping her bus card against the machine.

As security from the transportation station stepped in, it calmed down a bit but the argument started back up as the man boarded the bus and he went to the back. Both the man and the young lady were angry but I noticed his voice sounded more emotional. As their argument continued and the man got up out of his seat and moved forward towards the young lady, the older gentleman who had helped prior came to the back, blocked him again and prohibited him from going any further. The young lady remained seated although she was arguing back. The security guard came to the back too to intervene. The older gentleman kept telling the man, “bro, let it go.” The man turned on the older gentleman saying something like “you’re not my bro and why do black people keep hurting me.”

I then realized this man not only was angered but he had been triggered. I don’t know what really started the altercation between he and the young lady but both could have acted differently for a much better outcome. However, the man, who was also Black like the rest of us on the bus, was the adult and he should have really let it go so it wouldn’t have escalated. And no way should a grown man be hitting a young lady or calling her out of her name which he did.

I know that Black men endure a lot in this world day by day. I also know that sometimes they face a cruel and unfair justice system and just as much plight and hopelessness as any other man. But some Black men must remember Black women have to endure a great deal too in this world. And we are to be protected and respected also. Moreover, with the state of this world and the fact that we are living in the last days, a lot of people are walking around angry and with a chip on their shoulder. We are beyond stressed and triggered with even the smallest things. Nonetheless, we must build our self-control and empathy. And we have to pursue and promote healing individually and as a whole. I believe God has me in a season of healing. I have discovered, thanks to God, areas of brokenness in my life that God wants to heal me of.

Don’t dismiss your pain. Don’t dismiss another person’s pain either. Address it and let God provide you with the healing you need. Even if you get no closure from others, you can get it from God.

We cannot walk around with chips on our shoulders and be ticking time bombs. And we cannot move forward from something that has never been fully addressed. That is why some people don’t understand why some people can’t easily move forward (although there are other factors why also) from a loss or traumatic event. Some people say Black people should stop talking about slavery. But if it has never fully been addressed and acknowledged with true empathy and understanding, then how can we? So, we have to address the pain and not let it turn into a bomb. Even God addresses and acknowledges the circumstances and pain in our lives, but with the intent to heal and grow us and impact others for good.

Anyway, there is so much rage and pain in this world. Many human beings, no matter their nationality, ethnicity, social or class status are being consumed by anger. But Jesus came to give us life and life to the full and it is receivable through His salvation and your surrender. He knew we would have storms and issues in our lives. He knew this world was a hot mess and broken. But His truth, life and way are our shields. His Holy Spirit is our comforter and His Father has the last say. He is our defender and present help in the time of trouble.

I was glad that the older gentleman intervened and tried to calm the man down and get him to control himself. I reiterate that we have to pursue and promote healing. And yes God can grow you and heal you during your storm! So, where can we begin.

  • Get therapy or find a support group and build a support system.
  • Face the truth. Receive the truth. If there is a problem, are you avoiding it? Where do you need healing? What boundaries do you need to set? Do you have anger issues? What are your insecurities shouting? What in this world is bothering you? You can take the answer to this and work towards being a part of the solution and it can lead you to your purpose.
  • Embark on a healing journey. Ask God to show you what that looks like. What do you need to heal from, and work towards facing, releasing it in a healthy manner, and growing from? Get scriptures about healing in the particular areas you need healing in.
  • Make a choice to heal and to grow daily .
  • Practice self-control and feeling your emotions and then steward over them in a healthy way. If you are angry, don’t hold it in but find ways to release it in a safe and healthy way. You can also practice calming techniques such as counting to ten or taking deep breaths until you can sift through the anger, address or find the problem, and then find the solutions.

Im not a psychologist or therapist but I do know we all need healing from something.

Do you have a chip on your shoulder? Are you on a journey of healing? What does that look like for those who may not be on this particular journey now? How can you be intentional in pursuing healing and growth, and why is God leading this pursuit so important?